A Conservative Woman Will Not Solve All Your Problems
If you are a young man who desires to have a large, stable family, here are some things you really have to think about. I’m writing this as much for myself as I’m writing this for you. I’m writing to comprehend a phenomenon that I’ve been noticing—many conservative men in relationships with conservative women don’t seem to be all that happy or masculine. In most of these relationships, the conservative woman is wearing the pants in the relationship and it’s indistinguishable from femdom.
Too often I see conservative men simping female conservative influencers on Twitter. They are thinking, “If only I can get a conservative wife like that, my life will be great.”
No. You are miserable because you are a loser, and she does not have the panacea. Why are you looking for a woman to create a paradigm shift in your life or mindset?
If her nature is feminine, she would be yearning for a leader to sweep her off her feet and create a paradigm shift in her life.
If she expects you to fix her life and you expect her to fix your life… you see how there’s a problem here? Neither of you are taking the responsibility to fix the problems in your own life, and as the man, you ought to lead by example.
Personally, I do not desire a conservative woman. I desire to be a man who has his shit together in every aspect of life. All desires are ultimately ontological. This is evident in mimetic theory—you desire not the object itself, but to become more like your mimetic model. This is also how the Buddhists understand how desire traps you in samsara and to escape, you have to be a Buddha.
If you are reliant on her to change something in your being, you’re just avoiding personal responsibility and trying to get someone else to solve your problems for you. If you are always begging her to solve your biggest internal problems, how could she have respect for you? Are you being a man who’s deserving of her trust and respect?
A lot of naive conservative men think that having shared values is the most important thing in a relationship. They are wrong. If you are specifically targeting women who have the same values as you, you will always fail. As a man, you ought to already have strong values. Your will ought to be indomitable. Your values are timeless. It doesn’t matter if she initially had the same values. If you truly believed and lived by your values, she will see the effectiveness of your values being validated in your actions, and she would automatically want to adopt your value system.
If you think that you’re a bad boy and that you require a good conservative girl to save your soul from Hell, then you are weak.
Chant this quote repeatedly until you get it. A bad boy is reactive against a greater authority. The punishment of God is aligned with the Tao. As the punishment of God, your values transcend human values. She cannot save you or fix you, because you should have already saved and fixed yourself, and positioned yourself to be ready to lead her. You must take the initiative to assert your own value system rather than making her lead and react to her value system.
If your values are weak and you expect a woman with similar values to come reinforce your values, then you have already failed. You’re coming from a place of neediness and weakness rather than a place of assurance and determination. To truly win at all costs, you must believe that you can turn 10 thousand hoes into housewives and that men who say “you can’t turn a hoe into a housewife” are puny soyboys who deserve to have their women seduced and taken away from them by stronger men, such as you and your gang. You have to start living as a CONQUEROR rather than as a cuckservative.
This is related to the Madonna-whore complex. Many a time, I’ve heard young conservative men tell me how they think some women are whores and other women are virgins, and that you should never treat one as the other, and that virgins are strictly superior to whores.
They are wrong. The other day, I went to a strip club for a friend’s birthday. At the end of the night, I had far more respect for strippers than I did at the beginning of the night. Strippers keep themselves in great shape. They have their shit together in terms of finances. They notice and show gratitude towards small gestures of kindness. They are also honest about their intentions. They have seen real world risks and are shrewd enough to make decisions on their own.
I see far more virtues in strippers than the typical conservative virgin who is fat and flabby; broke and reliant on their man; have cold, bitchy attitudes; and are spoiled, ungrateful, and stuck up. If she actually had a ton of positive traits, she wouldn’t be a virgin. The only thing many of these virgins have going is that they have “conservative values.” These values are empty and vapid, and cannot withstand real world stress-testing. As soon as they settle down with a loser man and face hardships that ruin their perfect fantasies of traditional life, they would nag at him and cheat on him. In contrast, the only major flaw of the stripper is difficulties with pair-bonding. You shouldn’t hand half your net worth to them in marriage, but you can certainly respect and appreciate them for having far more real ability and substance than trad thots.
Boys who don’t have their shit together are fooled by virgins and whores in the same way. There is no dichotomy of the virgin vs the whore. There’s a bit of both in every woman. If you are a man who has his shit together, you should be able to handle both virgins and whores. Only weak men fear whores or fall in love with them. Strong and wise men understand the context of when one should be there for a good time not a long time. You should be able to identify each woman’s tangible assets and not fall for either the wholesome fantasy or the dirty fantasy.
If you’re respectable and trustworthy enough as a man, your wife would understand that even when you do go hang out with whores you keep your wallet tight and your heart cold around them. Jesus preached to prostitutes. Ikkyu meditated at brothels. If you are an honorable and authentic man, people can tell, and you have no fear of others judging you. Your wife would know that you’d always prioritize her, that you’d never lie to her or break a promise to her, and that you’re the only one who makes her feel truly special. She understands and is confident in herself that the side hoes are just supplements while she’s the irreplaceable main dish.
A queen isn’t alone; she’s the leader of the king’s harem. If you’re the CEO, then your wife is the COO, and your side hoes are entry level employees. The COO is their boss; she has no reason to be jealous of them. The COO has to be competent in multiple domains and the person you trust the most. Merely preaching the company/family values doesn’t make one good at managing family life.
Each man must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. - Ephesians 5:33
If you have your shit together, she will naturally respect you. You don’t need her to explicitly declare her conservative values. Good values are embodied in our DNA and antifragile. If your values need to be carefully and explicitly stated everyday, then they are fragile and not worth preserving.
If you fetishize conservative values, it’s no better than any other fetish, obsession, or addiction. You’re creating a market that contributes to negative societal incentives. Women become incentivized to show off their virtuous assets without really meaning it, much like how they are incentivized to show off fake tits. Manipulative women will capitalize on this through virtue signaling. This is why many religions have banned female preachers.
James Poulos often talks about how being too explicit is a big problem in modern society. Explicitness is masculine, while implicitness is feminine. Explicitly preaching one’s values isn’t so different from explicitly revealing one’s tits… and feminist protestors often do both at the same time.
When a woman displays her “traditional values” explicitly on Twitter everyday, it’s a porn substitute for repressed conservative men. He looks at her conservative tweets through the same lenses as a less repressed man looks at hardcore pornography. It’s all fantasizing about something explicitly revealed that ought to be private and hidden in a truly traditional society.
This is why we see female pastors turn into strippers and start Onlyfans accounts. It’s all the same underlying incentives and psychological motivations. Female preachers inevitably get aroused by all the attention and the act of revealing their private relationship with God to others and fueling the voyeuristic fantasies of cuckold repressed conservative men.
A female conservative influencer is a female drag queen. Women who perform this kind of culturally constructed sexual femininity are doing it to win intrasexual competitions. These women have hacked the system. By virtue signaling conservative values, they bypassed the scrutinization of any other attributes she may bring to the relationship.
Please don’t let your daughters become preachers or conservative influencers. If I had daughters, I’d rather let them be strippers when young and get it out of their systems than to remain repressed and become completely broken during a mid-life crisis.
Young men, please focus on improving yourselves. Asking women to be more conservative and hoping for a Jeanne d'Arc in shining armor to save you isn’t going to turn out the way you fantasized.
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